July 31, 2003
I Love Mean Reviews
So I'm linking you to this: Elvis Mitchell of the Times on "American Wedding."
And this: AO Scott, also of the Times, on "Gigli."
Any review which says, "it has a special badness all its own" deserves to be linked to.
(And if you're feeling industrious, or need a good laugh, take a minute to find the amusing "Gigli" review over at CNN.com.)
And just because we're linking to reviews, here's Brantley on "Avenue Q," which opened tonight. I am pleased to announce that this is NOT a bad or a mean review, although if I had written it, it would have been even more positive.
The other "mean" review is the one that I have for the terribly misguided production of "Man of La Mancha" that I saw tonight. And to add insult to injury, Brian Stokes Mitchell decided to take the night off. Let's just say, if I had actually paid for the tickets, I would have asked for my money back before the show based solely on the understudy notice. Sadly, I sat through the show and now cannot get those two hours of my life back, either. I'm not sure which surprises me more: the fact that such a confused production was allowed on Broadway - or the fact that so many of the tourists in the audience actually seemed to enjoy the show!
GoVeg.com
Anyone need a name change idea?
And yes, there is a picture of Ms. GoVeg.com herself. Or is that Miss GoVeg.com? I think my head is going to explode if I don't go eat some meat right now.
The Neverending Story
So I spent a chunk of time today cleaning my apartment. This is one of my least favorite activities, but it got to the point where I had to do it. I'm not one of those neat-freak fags whose apartment always looks like he's ready for Town and Country to show up to do a photoshoot. Just not my way. And it always feels slightly disconcerting to me when you do go into one of those apartments.
Mine looks somewhere between "lived in" and "hit by a tornado." But hey, I'm the only one who's ever here.
This is my quest, to clean my apartment, no matter how hopeless... (Yes, I'm going to see "Man of La Mancha" tonight. So I'll talk to you all later, devoted readers.)
July 30, 2003
Compulsive Planning
So I was at the knitting shop today, learning how to cable (it's really cool and astonishly not as hard as I thought it would be). This woman came in to buy some yarn and find some patterns, and when she was getting ready to leave, the motive of her knitting habit became clear to me.
"I'm getting my face done in a couple weeks," she cheerily informed all present (well, that was me, her, and the knitting store lady, but still), "So I'll have something to do, now, when I can't leave the house."
I don't think it exactly qualifies as two birds with one stone, but, well, what do I know?
In other news, I bought some yarn to make a baby present outfit for my pregnant cousin. And I know what I'm doing after dinner tonight!
July 29, 2003
Out With The Old
As I was unpacking my new computer from its box yesterday, I couldn't help but do a mental comparison of my new PC to my first PC, that late 80's Apple Macintosh Plus that used to sit on the little desk in the upstairs hallway of the house where I grew up.
Here's a link to a Computer Museum website's description of a Mac Plus. Ah, the good old days of switching disks between the program disk, the system boot disk, and the disk I was saving my High School English class term paper on...
The oddest thing about the fact that my old computer only had one disk drive? My new computer doesn't even have a floppy drive. Of course, it can burn DVD's, which no one had even heard of the late 80's.
The best part of the new computer? The fact that all this amazing technology, flat panel monitor, 2.8 Gigahertz Pentium 4 processor (God, compare that to that old Motorola 68000 chip), 80 Gigabyte hard drive (Gigabyte? That number seemed unfathomable in 1987)... costs less than the $2600 that the Mac Plus retailed for.
Ah, progress.
July 28, 2003
July 27, 2003
The Internet is for Porn
In a bizarre twist on the "All the news that's fit to print" concept, the New York Times ran this article by Frank Rich on, ostensibly, Jerry Bruckheimer's upcoming tv show about the porn industry. But never one just to write about what he has to write about, Rich has actually written a very interesting article on the state of porn as a mainstream "entertainment."
Worth a read.
Also worth commenting that the New York Times never fails to amaze me. I'm so glad that we have a paper like this in the city - and that I tend to agree with their politics.
Isn't it ironic that the NYTimes, which is the more liberal paper, is also the more "educated" paper - and that the trash rags like the NY Post and Daily News cater are more tabloid-y, not as well written, but much more conservative in their political views? Can we translate that to say that liberals are smarter than conservatives?
July 25, 2003
Bernadette Revisited
Dear Ms. Peters:
I humbly apologize for all the negative comments I made about your performance in Gypsy when I wrote about it here a few months ago and when I talked about you at Tony Time.
All I can say, Ms. Peters, is you found her. You found Rose. And goddamn, she's a fucking pistol. She's so totally focused, so driven, I really understood her passions and her drives. That doesn't mean that I liked her, but wow, what you made her do up on that stage tonight, well, I couldn't find words big enough. I couldn't find lights bright enough.
Thank you for sharing her with me. Now, care to share a tissue? I need to wipe off all these tears.
Thank you.
Jon
PS: Please tell everyone else in the cast that they were fantastic, too.
July 24, 2003
Everyone's a Little Bit Racist Sometimes
OK, so deaf people are not a race, but, well, after seeing "Big River," I have a minor anti-deaf theatre sentiment. I know, it's a mean thing to say on so many levels, but the show just dragged for me. Maybe it was the fault of the script.
But it felt more like it was the company. The man who played Huck, while cute enough, just didn't seem to have the acting chops for it. But maybe I am associating acting too much with speaking, and maybe if I could have understood the emoting in his ASL I would have thought differently about it. But I sincerely felt that if this man were a speaking actor and singing one, and the quality of his singing and speaking were as good as the quality of acting that he demonstrated last night, well... he wouldn't have made his Broadway debut as Huck Finn.
That said, there were a few powerful, beautiful moments. One (the silent singing) was very nicely described by Ben Brantley. Another was Jim's speech about his realization that his daughter, while having beat scarlet fever, had lost her hearing and speech. But by and large, there weren't enough dramatic moments to propel anything down this big river.
I feel really bad saying that I didn't really enjoy it; I know this people worked really hard and I have a lot of respect for them, but damnit, I wanted to be entertained.
Which I was, tonight... at Avenue Q. This show is just so on target; it's about the world I live in on so many levels. The characters have experienced the same thing that I have - the same rejections, losses, confusions, laughter, drunken insanity... and what more could you ask for in a musical? Well, "Urban Cowboy" did have boys in underpants, but I still prefer "Avenue Q." Now if only I had someone I could have held hands with during the romantic moments, or smooch, like the obnoxiously lovey couple sitting in front of me..........
July 23, 2003
I Have A Feeling We're Not in Bangkok Anymore
Well, I was hungry, as I often am, and after watching Tyler Hamilton win today's stage in the Tour de France, I ordered Thai food.
Sadly, I doubt it will ever be as good as it was in Thailand. The flavors were nowhere near as intense, especially on the hot and spicy level.
Sigh...
In other news, I figured out the best solution for my computer's perpetual crashing problem: I ordered a new computer (Dude, I'm gettin' a Dell). Now, mind you, in the half hour I was online BEFORE I ordered the new computer, my computer crashed three times.
Since I ordered the new computer? Not a single crash. I'm telling you, VAIO knows its days are numbered...
UPDATE: It crashed again this afternoon... twice.
Dinerlemma
There are two 24/7 diners near my house. One is better than the other. I just called the good one. And somehow, for the first time (ever?) their kitchen is closed.
What's up with that?
July 22, 2003
La Geografia
This really happened.
I was at work tonight and explained to the hotel security manager on duty that there's going to be a major traffic tie-up tomorrow with the funeral for Celia Cruz. I asked him to call the police precinct and find out what was going on in terms of street closures and plans about traffic so that we could advise everyone via email. He called me to confirm the details:
Him: Who is it again?
Me: Celia Cruz.
Him: How do you spell that?
Me: C-E-L-I-A-space-C-R-U-Z.
Him: And who was she again?
Me: The Queen of Salsa.
Him: And how do you spell that country?
July 21, 2003
Naughty TV Words
Lance Armstrong just said "Shit" on television.
Hehehehehe. He had a crash today (which he overcame to go on and win the stage and now leads the race overall by 1 minute and seven seconds) and, when discussing it in an interview, well, he swore.
But he's still winning.
July 18, 2003
Why-o Why-o Why-o...
Why am I blogging from Ohio...
Well, I had three days off from work this week and, just on a whim, I checked the airline's schedule and found I could come home and visit Mom & Dad for a mere $221 and get a bunch more Frequent Flier Miles - which I need! I'm perilously close to attaining Silver Elite Status! (God forbid that the code share I took to London earlier this year should have worked on my behalf in Frequent Flier Land).
So here I am in Ohio! It's all rather dull, but then again, that's kind of nice. It's always good to be out of the city, even though there's so much stuff I have to do -- I still haven't even had time to do laundry and totally recover from my trip to Asia -- but how often do I get a three day weekend that coincides with a good fare and Mom being amenable, schedule wise, to a visit?
We even came down from Toledo to Columbus to see my sister and her boyfriend. My sister works in a jewelry store, so we went there today as I had never seen it before. They do a lot of goldsmithing, and I found a gorgeous pair of matching pieces of lapis lazuli which are going to be made into cufflinks for yours truly, so we're rather excited about that. Then we saw her new condo and visited her cats, to whom I am majorly allergic, so we left and did some shopping. I found some really comfy shoes at Cole-Haan which sadly were not on sale but spent the remainder of the evening on my feet nonetheless.
Then we had dinner with her boyfriend, then went to see "Finding Nemo." Guess what? We found him!
And I got to drive Mom's BMW! Which I get to drive back to Toledo tomorrow... although work would have preferred it differently. They called me this afternoon to see if there as any way they could get me to work tomorrow. "Sorry, I'm in Ohio!"
But I actually used my sister's frighteningly slow dial-up connection (Most people out here don't seem to have high speed in regular residences -- only in hotel, universities, that sort of thing), so I spend forever on various airline websites finding out that it was stupid expensive to get on a flight tomorrow back to NYC. The really dumb thing about it is, there are plenty of empty seats, so what's the big fucking deal? That's the thing I don't get about airlines. At the Broadway shows, they'll sell 'em for half-price rather than let 'em go empty. I mean, I could understand if the seats were full, but if I'm not puttin' anyone out, then, well, what's the big fucking deal, yo?
But it was about $600 to change to fly tomorrow, so I'm staying as planned, and it's cheaper for the hotel to pay anyone who's actually there to do some overtime.
What's strange is that the hotel is as busy as it is! (That, combined with the trip to Ohio, is what was keeping me from blogging the past couple days, not to mention the extra spare time spent perusing Tour de France coverage.) On Tuesday night (the last night I worked), we were slammed. I was busy my entire shift. I was supposed to leave at 12am, but due to a variety of reasons, didn't get out until about 1, which rather pissed me off. I stopped at Sushi Seki on the way home and got a fabulous spicy scallop roll, then watched a bit of TV while getting ready for the flight on Wednesday.
And that, while not in chronological order, is what I've been up to.
I knew you'd want to know.
July 15, 2003
Nun of That For You!
Setting: The Abbey
Mother Superior: Sisters! Sisters! I have an announcement. I must tell you, we have a case of Gonorrhea in the convent.
A Blonde Nun sitting in back: Thank God! I am so tired of White Zinfandel.
I'm A Big Gay Sports Fan
I was going to blog about the very exciting day at the Tour de France, with Lance Armstrong engaging in some impromptu cyclocross action, but, then, well, I was watching an episode of "Sports Night" on my TiVo. Well, I gotta tell you, I have mentioned this show before, but I'm not sure that I can describe to you how brilliant it is. Tonight, I watched the pilot episode. Quite honestly, the only flaw with this episode was that the laugh track just didn't seem to fit in very well. But otherwise, it's one of the most brilliant episodes of one of the most brilliant sitcoms I have ever watched. I laughed. I cried. I'm serious, there was a tear streaming down my face and my heart rate was all sped up.
If you have Comedy Central, watch for reruns of "Sports Night." If you don't, get it. Or go to the video store - the entire run of the show is available in a box set DVD. If you're a really fabulous person, you'll buy a copy of the DVD set for me. And if you do that, you'll have to face my undying love. But I still won't have sex with you if you're a girl. I may be a sports fan, but I'm still a big ole gaybo.
Unlike IA who may just be a metrosexual.
July 12, 2003
The Weirdest Doctor's Office in the World
This quote from today's live coverage of the Tour de France explains a minor part of my fascination with bike racing, and especially with the dedication of TDF riders:
"After a display of frustration - some punching of the Kelme team car - Antonio Tauler is back on his bike after being involved in the fall and is now receiving treatment from the race doctor at the back of the peloton."
Note where he is when receiving medical treatment for having fallen off his bike. Yes, he's riding it.
Jet Lag 101
Lesson topic: Overcoming Jet Lag
Easy simple steps:
1: Take extraordinarly long trip, preferably at least 10 time zones away and ideally, over the International Date Line
2: Sleep as little as possible the night before said flight.
3: Take Ambien during flight.
4: Stay awake anyhow.
5: When you arrive at your destination, stay up as late as you can in order to approximate your regular sleep schedule.
6: Wake up at the butt-crack of dawn anyhow.
7: Instead of trying to go back to sleep, watch television.
8: Go to work.
9: During dinner break, have triple latte.
10: Come home.
11: Pass out.
July 10, 2003
I Have Returned
So I am home, sitting here in my new Thai silk robe (yes, it's pink. Shut up.) and surfing the web.
I found that Dear Abby has written about blogging in today's column. But perhaps even odder is the letter in the second half from the IT person at some company telling about the things he can see going on on his network.
The IT guy says he's not nosy. But he also says, "On more than one occasion, I knew that someone had bounced a check before he did." Now, wouldn't that mean that he used their user information to log into their account and check this type of thing? Or was he intercepting their email? Seems to me he's an unreliable creepazoid if he can tell that someone's bounced a check like that.
Anyhow, I'll tell you more about Thailand soon.
July 08, 2003
July 07, 2003
July 05, 2003
July 04, 2003
July 03, 2003
July 02, 2003
20 Hours of Boeing
I'm in Asia!!!
Yes, that's right, I spent about 20 hours on Boeing 747's. The worst hour, truthfully, was the hour we spent being delayed at JFK: they had loaded too much fuel into the wings, and it expanded in the heat, causing the wings to "drop." So they had to transfer the fuel to the fuselage or something like this. Bear in mind that Boeing 747's do not have very functional air conditioning when they're parked at the gate. So it was starting to get real hot there in that cabin.
We finally took off at 4pm Tuesday, NYC time. And the flight wasn't too bad. The Ambien didn't pack the punch it should have, though, and I spent a little more time being awake than I'd hoped. When we got to Tokyo (12 hours and 50 minutes of flying, approximately), we had to go through security -- not passport control, which I thought was kind of strange. I mean, we'd only just gotten off a plane, what could we have gotten ahold of that hadn't been allowed on the first flight? But it was not nearly as personally invasive as the security at JFK. They made me lift my shirt up to check out my nipple ring. And he patted down my crotch. "With the back of my hand," Mr. Security Guard made a point of showing me. Kinky, no? But noone questioned my knitting needles at all...
Anyhow, a short layover in Tokyo and onto the next 747 for the just-under-6-hour flight to Bangkok. On that flight, though, I was stuck next to one of those travellers that you hate to have to sit next to: ugly, stupid American who just wants to chat chat chat. I made a point of showing him that I was putting in earplugs, hoping he'd get the "leave me alone" hint, but he didn't quite take it. And the movie had to be fucking "Maid in Manhattan" with nasty skanky JLo. (I hate her, which is neither here nor there, but it made the movie unwatchable. I dozed through whatever the movies on the first flight were). So we landed in Tokyo at 11pm Wednesday, local time, and it's now 1am here. 11 hours ahead of home.
The hotel I'm staying in is lovely, and I can't wait for my room service dinner to arrive so that I can eat, then go to bed, and get up and explore tomorrow! See if Bang Cock really lives up to its name...
July 01, 2003
Oh the Weather Outside is Frightful
So I'm going to Bangkok tomorrow. Every day is at least 92 degrees and at least a 60% chance of thunderstorms according to weather.com. One hopes that as they're not in Asia they don't really know what's going on over there, but one doubts that. So instead, one is just grateful that one is staying in a really nice hotel.
Which hopefully has really nice air conditioning and a leak free roof.