I was at Game 6 tonight. Now, if you read this blog reguarly, you know I'm not much for sports but I had a decent time tonight, aside from the fact that it was cold and that the umpires appeared to be on the Red Sox' payroll.
It's always incredible to me to watch how people act when you put them all together in a big space - like a stadium. Everyone acts the same, hooting, hollering, carrying on. And they sing "YMCA."
Except for one young kid, probably 10 or 12, in the row behind me, who made up his own lyric. "Why Are You Gay?"
"Because I am," I replied. "Just like Mary Cheney." OK, well, I didn't say that out loud, but you know what I mean. I can't believe that this Mary Cheney thing is becoming an "issue." It's so much of a non-issue that it's offensive to me that it isn't a non-issue, you know what I mean?
Anyhow, back to something that is an issue. Why do straight people love "YMCA" so much? I mean, here's a song by a band full of homos about homos going to what was essentially a bathhouse to have public sex. Sure, it's a catchy tune, but listen to the words, people. I thought you were offended by shit like this.
Fucking hypocrites, aren't you?
Anyhow, the game was fun until the umps turned out to be Boston fans in disguise. It was really weird so be sitting there watching beer bottles fly down from the upper levels onto the field. I thanked the powers that be for the fact that my seats were under a roof-y thing. And then they brought out the riot police which was really rather freaky. I called my dad on his cellphone, in a generally "Can you tell what the fuck is going on?" tone... He said "They want the riot police on the field."
"I can see that, dad. Why?"
He didn't know. So we all sat there in the wet, cold night, and booed.
And I kept humming "What A Game" from "Ragtime" in my mind... That, young man, is why I am gay.
Posted by Jon at October 20, 2004 01:31 AM | TrackBackAhhh Ragtime....such an amazing show with poor management. Thankfully I got to see it twice before it closed.
I don't get the whole YMCA thing either. The straights love that song for weddings too. What a riot.
Maybe the boy was asking you why you were gay to confirm his own feelings for other boys. You should have encouraged him to use his sister's Easy Bake Oven rather than play with his GI Joe. Or at least play with GI Joe and Ken together.
Jon
Posted by: Jon at October 20, 2004 09:46 AMyou crack me up! Wish I coulda been at the game too!
Posted by: gaile at October 20, 2004 01:16 PMThe whole YMCA business reminds me of the Wild West shows that were so popular while the actual West was disappearing, and the actual inhabitants getting pushed farther and father west, and treaty after treaty broken, cause Sitting Bull was just FINE if he was in a Wild West show, and contained....
wait, that's not very cheerful or optimistic at all is it?
Sorry.
Election's getting me down.