Greetings! This is Jere, your intrepid guest-blogger here at The Jon Blog. First, I wish to thank Jon for giving me this opportunity, especially since, the last time he did so, I managed to crash the entire site for weeks. I'm not kidding. I wish I was. :)
Word of warning: I haven't yet decided what I want my time here at The Jon Blog to be. I do not have a blog of my own and writing one is still a new to me. Although I do read quite a few blogs. Perhaps even yours. And I've met quite a few interesting people through their blogs, some of whom I am now lucky enough to call friends.
In case you were wondering, two of my favorites blogs are written by Mike and Jeff. I guess you might consider them to be my Blog-Mentors. I do not write as eloquently as they do. I am not as technically-savvy as they are. Please bear with me as I fumble through something they do very well. And please check them out if you are unfamiliar.
By way of introduction, I suppose that I should tell you a little something about myself. I am a 31 year old gay New York actor. I can pass for 25 still. Sometimes I lie about my age, although not as often as I once did. This peculiarity of mine began at an early age when I got tired of being a teenager and was, thus, 20 for two years. Remarkably, no one seemed to catch on, at least no one ever called me on it.
I am currently unemployed, both as an actor and as an office temp, the devil's work that I have been doing for the past five years or so to pay my bills. If anyone reading this has a job for an actor or an office temp or both, please get in touch. Or if you would just like to pay all or some of my bills for me, that would be fine too. Either way, I'd be happy to have you take me to dinner and discuss it.
I have recently returned to New York from two and half months in Chicago, where I was playing a variety of roles in a musical holiday parody called RUDOLPH THE RED HOSED REINDEER. You see, instead of being ostracized by the community for having a bright red nose, Rudolph is banished for being a cross-dresser. Uh-Huh. Among my roles were Sheldon Glick, the smarmy lawyer who tries to shut down the show early on in the evening, Gay GI Joe on the Island of Messed Up Toys (where I also understudied Trailer Trash Barbie), a miscellaneous reindeer with a thing for pointing the finger, and a punk rock bunny rabbit.
My crowning achievement in this production, however, was understudying (and going on 3 times for) the brilliant Ed Jones as The Abominable Drag Beast of the North. You have to imagine me dressed as Cher, huge hair, glittery platform shoes, and all. This image will be much funnier for those of you who actually know me. The rest of you will just have to trust me.
For those of you interested in such things, the cast album is available for purchase at the Hell in a Handbag Productions website. Buy one. In fact, buy two, they're small.
Anyway, the production was great fun and I wouldn't have missed doing it for all the world. Chicago is a great town, in addition to being a great musical. Who knew? And the people were so nice to me. Mostly. I love them all. Especially David Cerda, the author of RUDOLPH, who also played Gladys Dasher in the show, and who once gave me a note on my performance right in the middle of a song called "They'll Hate You If You're Different." I've never gotten a note from the author on stage in the middle of a performance. It's...interesting.
Where was I? Oh, yes, I was revealing personal information in the hopes of being liked by all of you.
I am single and have lousy luck with men. Usually, the men I fall for live in different parts of the country. In addition, guys have a strange tendancy to meet their next long-term boyfriends/partners just after having expressed interest in me. It's weird, let me tell you. If you are single, gay, male, AND live in New York City, and you might be interested in going on a date with me, please do drop a line.
Tomorrow I am flying to Florida to visit my parents at their condo in Stuart, just north of West Palm Beach. I am ecstatic to be fleeing the cold for a few days. My body doesn't really do cold weather. Last year, when winter seemed to stretch into June, I was nearly suicidal. Were I in any other business, I would have fled to warmer climes ages ago. There will be lots of sitting by the pool and reading Jane Austen. And lots of drinking margaritas. I will be sure to keep you all informed.
So that is me for now. We shall see how this blogging goes. Hopefully I won't crash the whole operation...again.
Thank You Ever So.
Jere! Hey sweetie! At work inhumanly, ridiculously, dangerously late, and took a break to check up on Baggers. Good to see the East Coast contingent is doing well.
So exciting that you're going to be in Fla. If you're accosted by a red-headed, loud, Jewish woman that smacks of Mike Meyers' Linda "Coffee Talk" character, run away, it's probably my aunt. She will feed you til you puke and re-organize everything you own, down to alphabetizing your spice rack.
Here it is currently -1 degrees, Farenheit, and dropping. The Weatherbug alert today said that temps were expected to climb to a high of 5, but my favorite quote was this: "Wind Chills This Afternoon Are Expected To Only Climb Into The 10 Below To 20 Below Zero Range." Oh, ONLY 10 - 20 Below. Phew, that's good.
And this, too, was apparently written by a grandmother at Weatherbug: "Avoid Prolonged Exposure Outdoors. If You Must Be Outdoors, Dress IN Layers And Cover All Skin. Frostbite Can Occur IN 30 Minutes Or Less." All of the creative capitalization is Weatherbug's, not mine.
So, what I'm saying is, don't miss Chicago all that much.
You can always get a job here:
http://losangeles.craigslist.org/about/best/nyc/23123114.html
I haven't decided what to do with the prop "Xtra large Rudolph condoms" now that I'm single, but I'm not sure I'd trust their reliability after hanging around that show, either. They are a great conversation piece in my dining room, for the time being.
We miss you, honey. I'm sure that Hickson is drowning in his own filth by now, now that his au paire boy is gone.
Take care!
XOXO
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It wasn't really a note dear, Jere. More like an observation. Once your scene routine is down, it NEVER varies...., Does that apply to everything?
God Bless
Posted by: David Cerda at February 1, 2004 01:05 AMCall me Miss Bird's Eye...the show is frozen. ;)
Posted by: Jere at February 1, 2004 02:20 AM